Pretty Pink Princess Party

It's always been my dream to throw myself a princess birthday party!  Why do kids get to have all the pretty princess fun?  When researching ideas for my party I found that most fancy princess parties on Pinterest were thrown for one year olds!  One?  I wanted to host a princess party for grown-up women to dress up and feel fabulous!  You're never too old to be a princess! 

These beautiful mini cakes were the party favors.  Each lady got to take home a pretty cake on a cake stand made from vintage china.

We had a couple more princesses show up after this picture was taken, but you can see that everyone princessed up!  It was fabulous to be surrounded by so many beautiful women!  Everyone was invited with plenty of notice to find a dress.  I ordered mine from Amazon.  The pink taffeta was so lovely.   Amazon also had great prices on petticoats!  I found my sparkly diamondy shoes and gold shrug from thrift stores.  Finding the perfect dress was such a fun part of the party.

My daughters teased me that all my friends are way too loud!  They said that they couldn't believe so many people could be laughing so hard all night... I say that's a good sign!  We were all having a blast!

We played an ice breaker bingo game.  It was a lot of fun finding ladies to initial the squares.  I had small prizes for the first three people who got BINGO.  Most of the people at the party didn't know each other, so the game was a great way to find out interesting facts about each other.  After the game was over I read each square out loud and had everyone raise their hand who fit the square.  I don't think there were many shy ladies at the party, so an ice breaker wasn't totally necessary, but it sure was fun!

Pink cotton candy is my favorite!  Placed in nut cups and topped with crowns cotton candy looks adorable!

Setting everything up was so much fun!  I had a couple of great friends come early to help me get everything ready.

Pink meringue cookies are so princessy!  I totally want to play with the meringue cookie idea more for other events!

I hired a friend to make the meringues, scones and mini cakes.  They came out so perfect!

I scoured thrift stores for weeks to find the perfect vintage pieces to make the 20 mini cake plates.

I dressed up bamboo flatware with pretty washi tape.  I planned to use vintage china and silverware, but my daughters convinced me to use disposables so I'd have less dishes to do after my party.

One of the most fun parts of the night was the Italian soda bar.  I ordered several flavors of syrups with pumped to be mixed and matched.  Ginger ale, 7up and sparkling mineral water were the bases.

I purchased plastic cups with dome lids from a restaurant supply company.  Everyone was able to decorate their cup with stickers.  They came out really cute, plus it was easy to tell which cup was whose.  The instructions were written along the way so everyone knew how to make their drink.  Watermelon was the most popular flavor, which was surprising!  Tiger's blood is one of my favorite snow cone flavors and I learned that strawberry, watermelon and coconut are what goes into tiger's blood.  Yummy!  

Along with the sweets, I served chicken salad, egg salad and cucumber sandwich fillings, along with ham and a variety of cheeses.  Rolls and croissants were purchased from Costco for the sandwich bases.

The cakes made a stunning display!

The cakes were lemon with a vanilla buttercream frosting.  They were delicious!

Several of my friends stayed until midnight.  My friend Cearson and I died laughing at my husband who photobombed our midnight selfie.  The whole night was magical.  It was the best birthday party ever!

Breaking Molds

Sometimes the hardest mold to break is the one we put ourselves in.  When we tell ourselves that we aren't good at something, things just don't work out for us, we're too busy or we'll never be more than we are right now, we place ourselves in a little box that we can't escape without conscious effort.  

Placing ourselves into these molds can be very harmful.  It feels nice and safe and cozy in the little mold we've made for ourselves, but there is no growth in the comfort zone and no comfort in the growth zone!  

I often hear women play the "someday" game when discussing what they think will bring them happiness...  I'll do more for myself when my kids are older.  I'll be happy when we have a bigger house.  I'll wear cute clothes once I lose weight. I'll be able to do the things I want when we have more money.  I'll travel when I'm retired.  We seem to have this idea in our heads that we are stuck where we are right now and we won't find happiness, peace or satisfaction until some future event occurs.  We may be "stuck" in the fact that our kids are the age that they are, our house is the size it is and our financial situation is what it is, but there ARE things we can do within our situation to become fulfilled and it's up to us to figure out what those things are.  If you can't find happiness in your situation now, you never will. 

You need to climb out of the mold you've put yourself in!  You are your only obstacle when breaking free and finding happiness.  Take a class to learn something new, buy that adorable outfit in your size, make a new friend, develop a skill or talent or start putting money away for a vacation!  Whatever it that you dream of in your hidden little heart of hearts can happen.  We need to let go of the negative mentalities holding us back and create happiness for ourselves right now!  No one can do it for us! 

Lately I've been thinking a lot about what I want to do with my life outside being a wife and mother, which of course will always be my top priority.  Over the last couple of years I've developed a fear of failure that has been holding me hostage in a lot of ways.  Finding happiness and satisfaction in my life, as it is, has pushed me to decide it's time for me to break completely free of the safe mold I've created for myself and stretch my wings even further.  Who knows?  I might even fly!

   

I'm doing the best I can.

Something I've been thinking a lot about over the last couple of weeks is how I put myself down.  I like myself.  I have high self esteem, but I constantly put myself down in the form of generalizations I use to explain why I'm not as good as I think I should be.

Today is Sunday, and all day I've been avoiding doing a big cleanup in my kitchen and putting away my sewing stuff from a project I finished Friday night.  Last night I had good intentions of cleaning both the kitchen and my craft room, but instead, Alyssa asked me to do art collages with her and I sure wasn't going to turn down the opportunity to hang out with one of my kids.  

This afternoon while making lunch I said, "I should clean this kitchen right now, but I'm a horrible homemaker."  Why would I say that?  I could have said, "This kitchen is extra messy because the kids have been home on Christmas break for two weeks, I could have done it last night, but I was being a good mom by spending time with one of my kids.  I want to enjoy my Sunday, so the dishes I did today are good enough and I can do the rest tomorrow." but instead I put myself down.  Just because my kitchen is messy today does not mean I'm a horrible homemaker.  

I also say things like, "My kids don't go to church because I'm a crappy mom." or when I say no to doing something or being charge of something, I'll say, "I'm sorry, but I can't.  I'm really flaky these days."  My kids don't go to church because they have their own agency and they choose not to.  That doesn't mean I'm a crappy mom.  I have taught them what I believe and been an example to them.  That's all I can do.  

I can't be in charge of as much as I used to because I'm a full time caregiver with a lot of appointments and our day to day can be unpredictable.  That doesn't mean I'm flaky.  It means I'm in a different stage of life right now and can't do all that I use to.

As women, we seem to put a lot of unnecessary guilt on ourselves.  Every time our kids rebel we think it's our fault.  Every time our house isn't spotless we think it means we aren't clean enough.  Every time we say no to someone we think we aren't good enough.  WHY DO WE DO THIS?  

We will never have perfect kids, a perfect marriage, a perfect house, be able to help everyone we want to help or do everything we wish we could do.  We. just. can't.   We KNOW we can't do it all.  If we heard a friend putting guilt on themselves or being mean to themselves because of something like this we'd tell them to knock it off!  If we can be forgiving of the "faults" of our friends and neighbors, why can't we be forgiving and understanding of ourselves?

I'm doing the best I can!

Every day, sometimes all day every day, I say to myself, "I'm doing the best I can!"  I say it to my husband.  I say it to my kids.  I say it out loud and I say it in my mind.  It's so easy to get overwhelmed with everything I feel like I'm failing at.   

One thing I'm working on is letting go of the word "fail" in my vocabulary.  Just because I'm not where my brain tells me I should be, doesn't mean I'm failing.  I'm doing good!  My house is reasonably clean and organized, my kids are smart and funny, my marriage is happy, I have great friends and I have a lot of gifts and talents.  The end... not my house is clean, but blah blah blah it's not as clean as it could be.  It's fine!   We as women need to learn to state the facts and leave off the negative buts or becauses at the end.  We owe it to ourselves.  I'm doing awesome and so are you!  

Mean Girls

Yesterday while I was at Nina's school being a model for her Halloween fashion show Nina pointed out a girl who had taken a picture of her in class without her knowing it, posted it online and made fun of her... of course one of Nina's friends saw it and showed Nina.  Not only that, but the girl's mom even commented on the picture. Nina thinks that the girl's mom is my fb friend although I have no idea who she is.  To that mom and any other moms of "mean girls":  

I am thankful every single day that I have a beautiful, confident, fabulous daughter who loves herself and doesn't care what people think about her. She took a long hard road to get to the place she is now and I'm grateful she's here.  Women often don't gain their full self esteem until they're adults with children of their own and many never do.  A big reason for that is girls are so harsh to one another.

Girls who feel the need to put others down in order to make themselves feel better are lacking true beauty and it shows.  I watched this girl throughout the day yesterday as I sat in the hair and makeup chair.  I saw how she interacted with those around her, how she looked and spoke to other girls.  She may have been very Barbie-like on the outside, but I felt sorry for her.

The confidence and self love that shines through my daughter's eyes can't be faked or bought. She is gorgeous and it radiates from her.  Shaved head, death hawk, bihawk, crazy makeup and all I have an extremely beautiful daughter who is noticed from a block away because she doesn't want to be like everyone else.  She loves herself and wants to stand out and it shows.  Her style isn't one I would choose and I don't always understand it, but I encourage her to express herself through her looks.

Making fun of her style didn't hurt her feelings, it just made her (and I) not like the girl who did it,  but if this had happened to a less confident teenage girl, even to Nina a couple years ago it could have been devastating and had serious results.  The teenage years are a tough time for girls.  They're hard on themselves, they don't need other girls to be hard on them too and with the internet it's a lot easier for girls to be mean to each other in a very public way which makes matters worse.

I have teenager daughters... One is extreme in her looks and one is traditional.  They are both normal girls.  They make fun of other girls.  They can be jerks... BUT when I hear them talking meanly about someone or putting people down I say something.  I tell them to knock it off and quit being brats. I point out the good in others.  I try to help them to see things they may be missing.  As moms it is our job to teach our girls to treat each other with respect.  They might laugh at me when I'm listing good qualities in someone, but at least my words are there as the Jiminy Cricket on their shoulder. 

In school I didn't like the mean girls.  I didn't want to be like them.  I tried to be nice to everyone no matter what their social standing or how they looked.  I danced every dance because the nerdy boys knew I wouldn't say no to them like so many other girls did.  I was still pretty.  I still made the cheerleading squad.  I was still voted drama club president.  I still had friends.  You can be nice AND still have the full high school experience.  In the years since facebook came about I've received messages from people I went to school with thanking me for always being nice to them in high school and I've received messages from people saying they're sorry for being mean in high school.  Eventually we grow up (hopefully), which do you want your daughter to be?

Teach your girls to stand up for the outcasts, the crazies, the nerds, the freaks... They are some of the best people you can ever know who will grow up to do some of the most extraordinary things and beyond that, they are someone's daughter.  My daughter may have been able to shrug off someone making fun of her, but it hurt MY heart to hear about it.  Just like all the most important things our children need to learn, learning to be nice should start at home.

Feelin' Feminine Friday: China Sets

I feel that pretty china is one of the most feminine things in my house!  I love looking at it, displaying it and using it!  I'm borderline totally obsessed with vintage china.  When I find a new-to-me set of china I get so excited!  I do sell china sets and teacups so I don't get too overrun in my home by vintage china, but even if I only get to own it for a minute, that's enough!  I bond with every china piece I come into contact with.  If it's a large set I think of the care it took to keep all the pieces together.  If it's a single piece I wonder where the rest of the set ended up.

Beautiful china depicts a different era and mindset.  It speaks to me of picking your china pattern as part of your engagement, luncheons with the ladies and afternoon teas with a loved one.  I'm always tempted to invite ladies over for herbal tea and maybe some sandwiches or homemade rolls, but it seems like our world is so go-go-go all the time I almost don't want to inconvenience my fellow moms by making them slow down.  Isn't this a silly world we live in?  Perhaps I should start a once a month tea tradition.  It doesn't have to be a huge ordeal, just a couple of friends getting together and enjoying a slice of old fashioned femininity.

Feminine Friday: Vintage Valentine's Tablescape

I love love love vintage china!  I sell a lot of it, and lately I've been collecting a bit more as well.  I've been working on a collection of mismatched pretty feminine plates, because apparently having several matching sets of china isn't enough in my world.

Everything about these vintage plates is feminine!  The shape is feminine, the size is feminine, the flowers are feminine... I love looking at feminine china and I really love using it!  I don't understand the point of collecting dishes you don't use, so I make it a point to use mine often!

The dishes are feminine, but so is the very act of setting a pretty table and having friends over for a dinner party.

Instead of fighting the crowds on Valentine's Day I decided to host a dinner party with three other couples.  It was so much fun!  I was able to use my pretty mismatched china and even though some of the men might have thought I was odd, the ladies appreciated it!

 There are so many pretty plates out there, a mismatched set is the perfect way to enjoy them all!  Plus it's so much easier to find plates when you don't limit yourself to one pattern.  Maybe someday I'll have a hundred mismatched plates!
I already tell my kids that as soon as Nina moves out I'm making a bedroom into a dish room, so hundreds of dishes is a real possibility! *grin*

The centerpiece was pulled together with odds and ends from around my house and placed on a vintage mirrored vanity tray that is heading to market.  It looked so feminine and perfect for Valentine's Day!

I love hosting dinner parties and I've made it one of my goals this year to host more!

Playing hostess makes me feel feminine, which I love!

Feminine Friday: Vintage Sheets

Oh vintage floral sheets... I love you so! 

The pastel colors and floral patterns on vintage sheets are so feminine and pretty!  I love them so much!  I outfit my bed with vintage sheets and I feel like a princess!

So often when I get a bundle of vintage sheets they've all come from the same estate... sometimes dozens of them!  I love to imagine some granny's linen closet piled high with the same sheets she's had since she was a young bride!

I love the ties that vintage items have to the past.  I love imagining who used them and where they got them.

Vintage sheets are great for fabric too!  It so much cheaper to use a vintage sheet for a sewing project instead of buying vintage (or even new) fabric...  They've been preshrunk, they're super soft and you can't get much more feminine!  I saw a picture somewhere of 1950s-60s feminine dresses made from vintage sheets.  I hope to take that project on someday!

These guys aren't vintage sheets, but I recently got them and wanted to show them off!  Aren't they the cutest pink vintage kitties?  The angry one is my fave!  They've taken up residence in my bathroom and I smile every time I see them!  I just love feminine things!

Feelin' Feminine

Femininity is a beautiful trait women are blessed with.  Here are a couple of things that make me feel feminine:

Spending time with my daughters always makes me feel feminine!  I love being with them and I love being a mom of teenage girls!  I know it sounds crazy, but being able to relate to them and teach them and yes, even get frustrated at them is something I am so grateful for!  My girls are growing into really beautiful women and I'm proud of them!  I love to see the choices and decisions they're making and see the feminine traits they have, even if they try to hide them.  One thing I try to teach my girls is that being feminine doesn't make them weak... They haven't quite grasped it yet.  They want to prove they can do everything that boys can, but I hope that it clicks with them at some point that just because they can do it doesn't mean they have to...  Women and men should celebrate their differences, not try to prove why we're all the same!

I know that it sounds weird to say that being a mom to a boy makes me feel feminine, but it does!  Caleb already has such a love and respect for women that it makes my heart happy!

He opens my door when we're walking into a store, he'll come out to my car and see if I have any groceries that need carried in when I get home, he fusses over me when I have a busy day and tells me I should relax and take breaks.  He takes really good care of me and that makes me feel feminine!  Any time a man is looking out for my well being I feel feminine, even if that man is only 12!

Chocolate.  With raspberries.  In a pink wrapper.  With a vintage design.  *swoon*  What's more feminine than that?  If you want a girly treat, this is it!

Dresses always make me feel feminine because...well, they're dresses!  Vintage dresses always bring that femininity to another level.  Whether it's a 1950s party dress or a 1970s dress that semi-resembles couch fabric, vintage dresses make me feel feminine!

Add jewelry, heels, tights and everything else that goes with a dress and people can't help notice you're a girl!

What's made you feel feminine this week?  I encourage you to acknowledge and seek out those things that make you feel feminine!

Feelin' Feminine Friday

One of my favorite things is vintage lingerie... slips, nightgowns, stockings, even vintage bras and girdles are so feminine and lovely!  Before the days of underclothing oozing sex or practicality, they were just pretty and girly.  I grab them up whenever I can to fill Millie the Glamper's closet.  Sometimes I can find a whole drawer full at an estate sale and I'm almost giddy!  I am not alone in my love for vintage satiny treasures!  They are one of my best sellers!

I don't think I've actually worn a satin slip since I was a little girl, but I'm still drawn to their beautiful femininity and I remember dancing in my slips as a child feeling like a princess.  These three slips I'm showing off today were "Union Made in the USA".  I love seeing that tag on vintage clothing!

Something about these three slips spoke to me when I found them.  They came from the same thrift store and most likely the same home since they are all the same size and era.  I couldn't resist them.  The pink one caught my eye first of course, but I had to bring all three home with me! The lace and the designs on each are incredible!

There is just something really feminine about vintage underclothing and nightgowns that I can't pass up. They make me smile.

Divorce: 10 Lessons I've Learned

I was thinking about divorce today. Surprisingly it's not a topic I think about often. I think about being single all of the time, but not about divorce itself. Three years ago I chose to leave a very bad marriage. I've learned a lot of lessons since then and I thought I'd share a few of them with you. I am speaking to those of you going through or who are thinking about going through a divorce. This posting may seem like it's just for those of you going through a divorce, but it's not. There isn't a person out there who doesn't know SOMEONE who is getting divorced, is divorced or who is thinking about it. When you are informed you are a better friend.


Lesson #1: Your married friends scatter. This isn't a conscious decision on their part, but your world is changing and they were part of your old world. This is especially true if you used to do things as combined families. We all have (had) those awesome friends who you do everything with, you are friends with the wife, your hubby is friends with the hubby and your kids all play together... you know the ones. When your family is broken people don't like to be put in the middle or take sides (even if one side or the other is clearly in the right or wrong). It becomes awkward for them to be friends with you separately. You drift apart from them.

It doesn't happen all at once, but you'll gradually see most of your friends slipping away. If you and your friends were all stay at home moms and now you have to work you won't be home during the day anymore for phone chats and hanging out. You don't have as much in common anymore with your friends also as you enter the dating world and they're still in the wife world. This was one of the hardest things for me to deal with and I've seen it happen to many divorced friends (men deal with this as well) so I know I'm not alone. That doesn't mean you'll never talk to your friends again (although that happens often too) but your relationship with them changes, best friends become acquaintances. I still get sad when I think about friends I used to be close with. I miss them even though I still see and talk to them here and there.

Lesson #2: That civil/friendly relationship you have with your ex most likely won't last. Some divorces are nasty from the start. This isn't the type of divorce I'm talking about. I'm talking about the friendly, no contest, we're friends for the children type divorces. I had one of those. My ex didn't like me, but we were able to remain friendly for the kids. All divorce arrangements were made quickly and without lawyers. We sat down together and worked out arrangements, we even went to the required parenting class together. We would talk on the phone and discuss the kids and when he'd pick up and drop off the kids we were very friendly. I had divorced friends tell me that this stage wouldn't last. I didn't believe them. They were right. A little over a year after our divorce was final all hell broke loose. Here we are now in one of the worst divorced relationships I've seen. I've been harassed, put down, called names, screamed at, sworn at, called a terrible mother, etc. on a very regular basis.

When I see friends who are recently divorced I warn them that their friendliness won't last. They laugh and don't believe me because they're "different"... hahaha One by one I see that friendliness wash away and the angry ex relationship develops. Oddly the exceptions I've seen is when the man leaves the woman (which is rare in divorce). I believe this is because women are naturally more forgiving and women can forgive being left. This isn't always true, but men seem to hold grudges longer. You may settle back into a "friendly" relationship again years down the line or you may not.

Lesson #3: People change. This seems like it's a given, but people REALLY change. As you go through a divorce you go through a "finding yourself" process. As moms we have to be strong and stable and steady for our kids. We may go through a "wild" stage, but it's usually pretty mild. We may cut our hair off (I cut 10" off mine after the divorce because he always liked my hair long), date guys we wouldn't usually date, get a tattoo, stay out all night when the kids are gone, etc. Often times for men it's a lot more drastic. My kids went from having a happy little church going family to having a dad who drank alcohol in front of them, swore in front of them, allowed them to watch whatever movies they wanted, had them sleep at his girlfriend's house (who smoked, drank, swore and wore "immodest" clothes), told them he didn't want anything to do with church, didn't have them brush their teeth or even change their clothes over the weekend, etc. All these things happened in a month's time. Their world turned upside down and so did mine as I heard them talk about things they were witnessing that seemed so "bad" in their minds. I'm not judging people who do these things; I'm just trying to show the night and day change that happened in my very sheltered (up until that point) children's lives.

You have these sweet precious children who you and your spouse guarded with your lives and protect them and teach them values and then you let them go. They're so young and you let them go. You have no say as to where they are, what they're doing or what they're hearing. That spouse who was your partner in raising your children now is his own separate person. Sometimes he will agree with you and your kids won't have drastic changes in the way they're being raised. Lucky you! But that often doesn't happen and as long as they aren't being abused or neglected it's out of your hands. To send my kids away every other weekend at such a young age to a place that went against everything I had taught them was like having my heart ripped out. I have had so many conversations with my kids at SUCH a young age that I never expected to... things like not getting into a car with someone who has been drinking, demanding that you change your clothes and brush your teeth, the importance of waiting until marriage for sex and making their own decisions about movies to watch are just a few of the conversations I have had with them. Remember, my kids were 10, 7 and 6 when I got divorced. Talking to a 6 year old about not getting into a car with someone who has been drinking is not what most parents expect to do.

Lesson #4: You will make unexpected friends. People who you would have never looked twice at in your previous life will become your best friends. There is something very bonding about being a single parent. You deal with so many of the same challenges and trials that you can't help but be friends. It may be hard to find other singles at first, but as you network and attend singles activities and such you will find them and you will love them. They understand you like married people never will.

Lesson #5: The loneliness is harder than you ever imagined. You may have people who love you and care about you and serve you, but it is not the same as having a spouse. Even if your marriage was terrible and you felt alone there is a difference when you are divorced. It is easy to get down. Be aware of the loneliness that will come so it doesn't engulf you. Expect to get sad and overwhelmed. Expect to grieve. When I left my marriage I was happier than I had ever been in my life. I was excited to date and to start over and to get away from a bad situation and I was right, it was pretty amazing. But the loneliness gets me down. It's so nice to be happy, but not so nice to not have someone to share that happiness with. Yes, I have kids and I love them and they are fantastic, but it's not the same thing.

Lesson #6: Be very careful about what's in your divorce decree. This is the decree forever. It's costly and not very likely a judge will change it later. Be so cautious about every word. Don't be too giving, but also don't be too greedy. I was so happy to be out of bad relationship that I didn't fight for anything and now I regret certain things that weren't put into our decree. This warning is not just for women, but men too... make sure that all is fair.

Lesson #7: The second time is easier. This is another caution. Second marriages are often rushed and they don't last. Divorce is so much easier the second time around. Be careful and be sure it's right.

Lesson #8: This is mostly (but not all) for my LDS friends. Obeying the Law of Chastity is not easy. AT ALL! I thought it would be simple. Being married to a sex/porn addict meant that sex was a terrible part of our marriage... really sexual issues are what broke up our family. I hated sex because of him... so you'd think it would be easy to stay away from all things sexual, right? Wrong! I hear so many newly divorced people who are strong in their verbalizing of how they'll stay away from anything more than kissing... WOW! The first chance they have their values are left in the dirt. It is NOT easy to be good! You will be so shocked at how tough it is! This is nothing like the first time around!

And for you non-LDS people. You may not believe in abstaining from all sexual acts until marriage, but you need to be cautious as well... it's very easy to become, well, easy! When you have men who shower you with compliments and affection you feel amazing and your self esteem sky-rockets and it's hard to not give in. Figure out where your physical boundaries are and stick with them!

Lesson #9: Confidence is everything when dating! Everyone dates differently. Some people are ready right away and some people need time. Some want to date around and some want a relationship right away. But when you are ready to date remember that confidence is HUGE! Even if you have to fake it until you feel it, be confident! Dating takes a toll on confidence sometimes, you get rejected, you get twitterpated with men who don't feel the same way about you, sometimes you deal with cruel men who will put you down and it makes you feel like they're confirming all the doubts you have about yourself, but STAY CONFIDENT. If you are not in an emotional state to handle rejection then you probably aren't quite ready to date yet.


Confidence is more than just knowing how amazing you are, although that is important. You have to be confident in your looks. That is much tougher for most women. We can often be pep-talked into what a good catch we are, what a great mom was are and how many awesome qualities we have, but it's a lot hard to talk ourselves into being happy with our bodies. I'll be brutally honest with you. If you don't have any bait to catch the fish you aren't going to hook them. You need the bait and the hook. The bait is physical appearance in the dating world and the hook is all those amazing things about you that let you hold on to that fishy you want! It's a myth that all men want a size 2 blond Barbie doll. If you are a size 2 blond Barbie then good for you, but you probably still aren't totally confident because that's how women work.

I have talked to thousands (literally thousands) of single men. Very few of them are looking for Miss. Skinny-Minny. Play up your favorite physical qualities, dress to flatter your figure, do your makeup and hair and be CONFIDENT! I am not tiny by any means, but I get a lot of attention from my looks. I can be sexy without being immodest, I can be beautiful without being skinny. Wanna know how? I'm confident and confidence pulls men in like a magnet.

Lesson #10: Welcome back to high school. I have never seen so much game-playing, back-stabbing, mind games and raging hormones in all my adult life! Welcome to the world of single adult dating... hope you don't have to stay long! It's not just in the dating world. I think many single people don't have a spouse to keep them occupied so they fill up their time with other people's business. It can be a big stress when you already have enough stresses. Choose your friends and who you confide in carefully. I have learned this the hard way.